I often feel like an alien walking among humans. The way I’ve always thought and felt has never aligned with the world’s trajectory. Lately, I feel as though my train of thought is going in the complete opposite direction, leaving me questioning whether I should trust myself right now?
Don’t Be a Humble Hero
The humility within me would normally assume I’ve got it wrong and try to conform to the crowd. But the new, improved, mature, and self-regulated Rea understands that there are many different versions of “the truth.” It got me thinking about how we criticise others for simply living their own lives. Humans predisposition is selfishness, we tend to view the world through our own lens condeming anything that goes against our linear thinking. While I believe it’s fine to have our own experiences, life isn’t this one-size-fits-all garnment we all can don. We need diversity to thrive, yet it seems the 1% worldview is pushed, making the rest of us 99%rs feel like we’re on the wrong path.
As I’ve shared before, my teenage years weren’t the most enjoyable. I spent most of the time hating and misunderstanding myself. Constantly told I was wrong, I never believed I could make sound decisions, so I emulated that battling internally between what I wanted and what I thought was the right thing to do. My 20s were a blur of navigating the world with little guidance, expected to become the best version of myself with low self-esteem and no real support from those who came before me. This was weird to me, as I was expected to be the best version of myself despite being left with low self-esteem and no aid to walk me through the process. By 30, I thought I’d cracked the code, entering my “Thanos dynasty” phase where I didn’t care what the world thought. Yet, I still desperately sought validation, using others’ lives as a blueprint.
Pushing Through Uncertainty
These decades of uncertainty and misguidedness made me terrified of mistakes. It felt like one wrong choice could ruin my life. I didn’t trust myself, and despite growing, self-doubt still runs deep each time I am faced with a conundrum. Every decision triggers a mental debate, and while I know I learn from mistakes, I’m ingrained to believe they’re a crime against humanity.
The problem is that many of us have a poor relationship with failure. We hide our mistakes in shame, hindering our learning process and making it difficult to offer supportive or advice to others. Instead, we often pass on that same shame through warnings and disapproval when really what they are doing is kind of admirable.
I’m getting better at accepting that everyone’s life is different. While advice can be helpful, ultimately, our decisions should align with our own vision, not someone else’s. Sometimes, the feedback we receive isn’t rooted in love, but in the giver’s own unresolved fears. Don’t let those fears become your story. The gift of life is about venturing out and creating a fulfilling life for yourself, not fulfilling someone else’s unfulfilled desires.
Self Belief is the Key to Happiness
Remember, trial and error is a concept for a reason. We’re meant to experiment, learn, and find the right path. The saying “be yourself, because everyone else is taken” applies to more than just personality. It relates to the choices we make. majority of the time, the only person who knows what you need is you. You have the ability to actualise your dormant dreams. Don’t let disapproval from others stifle your potential. Sometimes, the approval you seek is the self-doubt you need to overcome. Trust in your own power, everyone else does.
